Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Randomize
