yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize