I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Randomize
