I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
You smell like a Billy Joel song
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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