it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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