in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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