he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize
