Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
