ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
