It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
