My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
We had to coat check the pizza.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Randomize
