I cannot find my penis.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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