so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
