I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize