We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
