its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
