in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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