A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Randomize
