friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize