I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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