and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Your topless pictures make me question reality
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
