So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize
