Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
