Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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