i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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