so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Randomize
