I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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