that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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