I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
