2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
