Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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