Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
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