weddingsv make me drug and hornr
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
