Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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