we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
