even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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