when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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