Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Randomize
