we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
