i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
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