We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
He? As in you personified your dick?
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