I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
