just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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