party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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