Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Little spoons don't ask big questions
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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