there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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