that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
