I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
She told me I should be a condom model.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
