There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
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