I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
